I’ve lost count of how many times parents have warned me their child “doesn’t do well with photographers.” But what exactly does that mean? Usually, it’s anything from being super shy to wildly energetic—but mostly, it’s the worry that their kid won’t follow directions or say “cheese” on cue. Honestly? That’s not my thing either. Follow along as I share some of my favorite ways, as a Spokane family photographer, to capture kids exactly as they are—real, relaxed, and genuinely themselves.
A Bit About my Philosophy as a Spokane Family Photographer
The most important thing when photographing children is shifting our expectations. Notice I said shifting, not lowering. To me, photographing kids never means lowering expectations—it means embracing a more honest and realistic vision of life with little humans.
Life with kids is messy, unpredictable, emotional, creative, and beautifully chaotic. Sometimes it moves at warp speed, other times it’s painfully slow. Rather than expecting children to adjust to our ideal photo scenario, I believe in meeting kids exactly where they are.
Before each session, I remind myself: “I will meet them where they are today, capturing the genuine moments that unfold.” It’s a mantra that grounds my work as a Spokane family photographer.
Want to dive deeper into how this plays out in real life? Check out my post: Photographing Kids Outdoors: Perception vs. Reality, where we dig into the truth behind capturing kids exactly as they are.
Children Love Choices and a Sense of Control
Children Love Choices and a Sense of Control
Let me ask you this: does “Stand right there, put your hand on your hip, and smile” sound like something that gives a child choices or any sense of control? (Spoiler: No.)
Now, what about this: “Hey, do you want to stand by the tree or over by the water? Oh, the water? Awesome—can you throw a rock in there? Whoa, great toss! Hey, can you look back at me real quick? Perfect!”
Both conversations aim for the same photo, but the second gives the child options and control. And you know what? They might still say, “No, I don’t wanna look at you!” And that’s completely fine! Even if they skip the eye contact, there are still plenty of genuine, messy, real-life moments to capture—exactly as they choose to be.
Things that create a sense of control
- Encourage exploration. Let kids check out their surroundings—climb, wander, touch things. It helps them feel relaxed and in charge.
- Use prompts and questions instead of commands. Limit directions whenever possible. Kids respond better when you say things like, “Can you find a cool rock over there?” instead of “Stand over there there.”
- Include them in planning. Kids love having a say. Try asking, “Where do you think we should take pictures?” or “What outfit do you want to wear?”
- Avoid forcing emotions. Skip phrases like “Look happy!” Trust me—it never works. Let them show how they feel in the moment instead of faking it.
My Favorite Games and Prompts to Encourage Fun
Often all you need is an environment that encourages natural exploration and a few questions to guide them along the way. However, there are also those times where children, and the one behind the camera, are feeling less inspired. Here are a few of my go-to games and questions that often get genuine reactions.
- Simon Says. This one is tricky because I find myself playing along and NOT ready to take a photo. However, it’s a great game to get movement and giggles out of kids.
- Tell me a joke. My son’s personal favorite. He LOVES telling jokes, and this one gets us both laughing.
- Do your cheeks feel cold or hot? Beyond being a super cute image, it gets children checking in with how they are feeling. It’s a great grounding practice for kids that are feeling nervous.
- Dance and freeze dance. The dance prompt is fantastic for the whole family. Bonus if you can find music to play in the background.
- Go on a nature treasure hunt. “Can you find something green?”
Be OK with Days That Feel Like Misses
I touched on this before, but I’ll repeat it because I think it’s essential. Be OK, and better yet, embrace the days that feel like misses. Those days that don’t feel “Pinterest Worthy” might be even more vital to the story of your family.
This image below is one of my favorites. Every time I see it, the photo reminds me of the day we decided to venture out for some pictures in the fog. However, my son chose to lay on the road and be one with the gravel. Don’t worry. The road was closed for traffic. At the time, I was frustrated but looking back now, I cherish those moments. They all make up our beautiful story.
I hope this post gives you a bit of inspiration to get out and capture photos of your children. Maybe it’s with a photographer like me or even better if it’s with your phone this weekend! Today is the time to take the pictures you’ll want to have tomorrow.
I love to talk about creating dynamic, family photo sessions. Let me know below how I can serve your family!
Cheers!
MB – A Spokane Family Photographer with a passion for capturing those in-between moments.
